Thursday 23 May 2013

THE DAY I JUMPED OUT OF A PLANE by alex hart

                  PLUMMETING  
 WALT : Use descriptive language to make writing more interesting.

As I secured my goggles to my helmet and strapped my boots on, my stomach churning as I stepped to the edge. I lothe heights but I know that the Ahaura townsfolk would be cheering for me down below as I was about to say no I felt a vicious shove in the back and before I knew it I was plummeting 3000 feet.

5 comments:

  1. great story it makes me feel like I'm jumping out of the plane myself and the shove in the back was very unexpecteted.

    ReplyDelete
  2. thats great it was very rell life i was hocked in strat away lol thanks for your time




    ReplyDelete
  3. Hey Alex,

    My names Mary and im from St Elizabeths, one of your QuadBlogging schools.

    This was awesome. There was a lot of descriptive words and it was very clear. You described everything perfectly. Awesome job and I hope you write more soon.

    From,
    Mary.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks a lot I look forward to writing and posting more of my writing I will soon be publishing the day I met a space creature

      Delete
  4. That is a really cool story with great adjectives.
    Alice.C Kaharoa

    ReplyDelete